Sunday, November 25, 2012

Monday, November 12, 2012


Today I underestimated my child yet again. There is no school, and I struggle with no school days. Finding things to do that keep him busy. So we worked on a worksheet. We matched words, and put the word "eat" up on the fridge so he could read it, and use it. He wanted cereal for a snack. When he requested "more", I poured just a few squares into the bowl, which got me a dirty look. He picked up the box, poured himself some more and set the box down on the counter. He then said "eat" very matter of factly. Okay, Chandler. I need to quit doing things for you and assuming you will pour the whole box in, or not know what to do. We also drove past the doctors office today on the way to the bank, and you didn't start crying. Progress!!! You are growing up before my eyes, and I'm afraid. For both of us. But we'll make it.

Monday, November 5, 2012

Those lazy welfare parents.....

Okay. Let me tell you a story. I got cut off assistance today. I make TOO much money. (I'm laughing and crying at the same time.) I have a degree. I have a grad certificate. But I am a single mom, with a shitty ex husband. I work my ass off, and I have a child with autism. I work for a non profit, and it means the world to me. I help families locate resources that they didn't know existed. I help them emotionally, and I will fight for them, with them, and reach out my hand in any way that I can. But God knows I don't do it to get rich, I do it because I was meant to. It gets in your blood and makes you passionate. I carry my cell phone at all times in case I am needed, I return emails within a day so a parent doesn't have to worry and wonder, and wait.
I will not get into the many reasons for my divorce last year, but lets just say I was a student while taking care of my home and family while he got a good job that I encouraged. I got about 4 hours of sleep at night, less during finals. When he decided a few rounds of court would be a good idea, my attorney bills climbing higher and higher, I had to get a job waiting tables on the only times I don't have my boys. That leaves no time for anything else. Stress relief, relationships, down time. I haven't been able to read a book (and I'm a hell of a fast reader) for book club, my treadmill is staring at me (although I do squeeze in a zumba class on saturday mornings), sex (lol), a clean house (yeah...okay). I know why people quit their jobs. Working hard is great, working yourself to death is not. I hand my fat roll of cash after a busy weekend to my attorney, keeping a little bit for coffee, or a matinee for the boys. Good for you Nicole. You aren't on any kind of assistance because you work so hard. Well...that's great. I have no health insurance. I just got food taken off the table for my children, so I can pay for my attorney because there is no help for that. Get a different job you say? No daycares to take my son with autism to. Don't you dare tell me you are voting for Mr. Romney tomorrow because you are pro-life. Or because anyone who "works hard" can build anything they want for themselves. If you were really pro LIFE, you would care about "quality of life" for families like mine. Go ahead and criticize me for being upset that I don't qualify for help, then come over for a few days and be me. Would you like to offer to start a daycare for special needs kids, work twice as hard, and get paid half the money? Didn't think so.